UDO KIER on PAMELA ANDERSON
So the first day of shooting I knocked at her trailer—which was enormous, as big as her breasts. So I knock and I hear from inside: “Hello? Come in!” So I stepped in the trailer and she was at least 25 feet away from me. So I went there and took both hands around her waist, which was like a transvestite, so small, and I said, “Wow! How amazing!” And I kissed her.
UDO KIER on BLADE:
The director was Stephen Norrington, British guy, and I went to an audition, which I hate. Audition is the worst thing. It’s like cleaning furniture in a department store. Anyway, I was sitting in the corridor, and there were people up for the same part as me, and I heard through the glass door [bellowing Master Thespian voice], “I was born like a vampire!” And I thought to myself, “Oh my god, I better leave. Could I go to the store and buy an ice cream? And maybe I’ll buy a chair from Eames. Maybe I’ll make myself happy.” Then I thought, “Well, anyway, I’m here, so fuck it.” So I went inside. Steve Norrington was sitting there. I said, “I wasn’t born as a vampire, just let’s do it like a stock broker.”
